I don't give a damn for a man who can spell a word only one way.
· Mark Twain
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Goodness, what beautiful diamonds! Goodness had nothing to do with it!
· Mae West
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I dont deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I dont deserve that either.
· Jack Benny
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No dream comes true until you wake up and go to work.
· Unknown
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Give a man a fish and he has food for a day; teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him of the entire weekend.
· Zenna Schaffer
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If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it.
· Linda Furney
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Do what you can with what you have where you are.
· Theodore Roosevelt
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Better to die on ones feet than to live on ones knees.
· Dolores Ibarruri
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'Mr. Churchill, you're drunk!' Yes, I am; and you are ugly. But tomorrow, I shall be sober.
· Sir Winston Churchill
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Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
· W. C. Fields
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Danger if you meet it promptly and without flinching, you will reduce the danger by half. Never run away from anything. Never!
· Sir Winston Churchill
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Like the dew on the mountain, Like the foam on the river, Like the bubble on the fountain, Thou art gone, and forever!
· Sir Walter Scott
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Where ignorance is bliss - Tis folly to be wise.
· Thomas Gray
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Don't wait for people to be friendly. Show 'em how.
· Unknown
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That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way.
· Doris Lessing
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The journey of a thousand leagues begins from beneath your feet.
· Lao Tzu
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I've developed a new philosophy... I only dread one day at a time.
· Charles M. Schulz
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Of Masturbation:- Don't knock it, it's sex with someone you love.
· Woody Allen
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Be true to your own act and congratulate yourself if you have done something strange and extravagant to break the monotony of a decorous age.
· Ralph Waldo Emerson
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If you keep your mouth shut, you will never put your foot in it.
· Austin O'Malley
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Develop a passion for learning. If you do, you will never cease to grow.
· Anthony J. D'Angel
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Intellectual brilliance is no guarantee against being dead wrong.
· David Fasold
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Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright ... until you hear them speak?
· Steven Wright
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Years steal fire from the mind as vigor from the limb; And Life's enchanted cup but sparkles near the brim.
· Lord George Gordon Byr
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Kill one man and you are a murderer. Kill millions and you are a conqueror. Kill everyone and you are God.
· Jean Rostand
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My mind's made up don't confuse me with the facts.
· Unknown
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There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to be a coincidence.
· Jeremy S. Anderson
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Torture the data long enough and they will confess to anything.
· Unknown
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Life in the twentieth century is like a parachute jump: you have to get it right the first time.
· Margaret Mead
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And herein lies the secret of true power. Learn, by constant practice, how to husband your resources, and concentrate them, at any moment, upon a given point.
· James Lane Allen
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War does not determine who is right only who is left.
· Bertrand Russell
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Don't take the will for the deed; get the deed.
· Ethel Mumford
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Do not make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans or they will treat you like dogs.
· Martha Scott
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A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
· Helen Rowland
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I think it's about time we voted for senators with breasts. After all, we've been voting for boobs long enough.
· Claire Sargent
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Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better.
· Andre Gide
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The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
· Unknown
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Always remember others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.
· Richard Milhouse Nixon
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Money is something you got to make in case you don't die.
· Max Asnas
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Observe due measure, for right timing is in all things the most important factor.
· Hesiod
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If compliments were food, I'd have starved to death 28 years ago.
· Erma Bombeck
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No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you'll see why.
· Mignon McLaughlin
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Not life, but good life, is to be chiefly valued.
· Socrates
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Ideas are precious. An idea is the only lever which moves the world.
· Arthur F. Corey
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To be average is to be as near the bottom as the top.
· Paul H. Dunn
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Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee And I'll forgive Thy great big one on me.
· Robert Frost
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When a person is groping in life, we say 'he has not found himself.' This statement is not accurate. Self is created, not found.
· Grant Von Harrison
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Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.
· Aristotle
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